Ahhh...okay I had to get that out of my system. I was just so satisfied with that book.
I guess for that portion you can say my title was quite literal but I have planned an entry with a bit more substance and a bit less self indulgence. In that sense the title has more metaphorical reasoning.
I'm not one for ideas of fate. Things that are meant to be. Destiny. Or as Kundera puts them, "fortuities" -- things that seem to fall into place because they're supposed to.
And I discuss this in the context of finding someone or falling in love because it seems to be the easiest but this concept is just as crucial in anything else. Health. Career. A car accident on the freeway.
Sometimes things happen in such a way that we can only think, "Well it must be!" We force ourselves into this romanticized state of believing that all the stars aligned and the forces of the earth exerted in such a manner for this particular series of events to happen in this exact manner, just for me, just for the sake that this was my destiny. Or if you choose to think this concept is not self centered, that this happened to fulfill the exact destinies of all humans.
As tempting and wonderful as these thoughts are and as delightful is the place these thoughts take you to--it's a crock of shit.
"We all reject out of hand the idea that the love of our life may be something light or weightless; we presume our love is what must be, that without it our life would no longer be the same; we feel that Beethoven himself, gloomy and awe-inspiring, is playing the "Es muss sein!" ("It must be!") to our own great love.
Tomas often thought of Tereza's remark about his friend Z. and came to the conclusion that the love story of his life is exemplified not "Es muss sein!" (It must be so), but rather "Es konnte auch anders sein" (It could just as well be otherwise)."
Now before I explain, don't judge this observation incorrectly. I'm not a pessimist. I love romance in every sense of the word. I love whimsical thoughts and moments. Astrology, as bogus as a large part of me thinks it to be, still fascinates and interests the hell out of me. I read into silly signs and I enjoy practically unreal and light as a feather musings. BUT, above it all is a solid sense of reality.
All that nonsense is for my own personal entertainment, an inside joke between me and my imagination. But when I come down from that whimsical high, I see that it is my own will that is going to get me to this--whatever this may be. If I meet a wonderful guy, I'm not going to say if it's meant to be, it'll happen. I know it takes doing something. And if it doesn't work, I won't leave it to bad luck or even the comfortable acceptance that it wasn't supposed to happen and that's why it didn't. That's denying what life is. That's sitting back and not doing anything because you think this cosmic concept of destiny will set the course of your life. It's an excuse for laziness, fear, and denial of the real reasons.
I'm a proud and faithful believer in something "up above," a monotheist, a Muslim. Now the most important part of that sentence is the word believer. I don't care from what part of the world you come. I don't care what you call yourself and I don't care what name you give to what you believe in. (Well, I do because I love to discuss religion and I find different philosophies on faith interesting but in the context of this post, I don't.) The whole point is believing there's something more than what we know exists on this earth, a source of all life, a source of everything. I call that God, or if you prefer Arabic, Allah. Now, along those beliefs, there is a part of me that refers to God when things seem to happen too perfectly, or things seem to happen too terribly to just be bad luck. I do believe things happen for a reason. But I don't believe that reason is fate or something predestined. I think of it as a nightmare is to the concept of dreams--it's your subconscious screaming at you to listen to it, observe, think and act. Just apply that awareness to real time. That's as extensive as my realistic romanticism goes.
I can't stand it when people let it go any further than that and waste their life because they believe whatever their lives are going to go though is already set--it allows you to not take any responsibility for how your life goes because you believe it was set by something else, against your own will, that you were born into this course and destiny or fate or Jesus (or whatever you believe) is taking the wheel (damn I hate you Carrie Underwood but I couldn't resist). It allows someone else to take the fall for your actions, regardless of whether they be positive, negative, or even a lack there of, WHICH I can't fucking understand or tolerate (I smell a strong hit at Christianity in the air....)
It's like finishing a book. What you have easily started wont finish itself. It takes time. It takes commitment. It takes the will and action to say, "I'm going to sit down and get through this and after I put forth that effort to get where I know I need to get to, I'll be satisfied with closing this loose end whether it was a great book or something merely mediocre."
Pieces of a puzzle fit each other perfectly but they only come together if someone makes them so.
Just as you take my hand
Just as you write my number down
Just as the drinks arrive
Just as they play your favourite song
As your bad mood disappears
No longer wound up like a spring
Before you've had too much
Come back in focus again
The walls abandon shape
They've got a Cheshire cat grin
All blurring into one
This place is on a mission
Before the night owl
Before the animal noises
Closed circuit cameras
Before you're comatose
Before you run away from me
Before you're lost between the notes
The beat goes round and round
The beat goes round and round
I never really got there
I just pretended that I had
What's the point of instruments
Words are a sawed off shotgun
Come on and let it out
Come on and let it out
Come on and let it out
Come on and let it out
Before you run away from me
Before you're lost between the notes
Just as you take the mic
Just as you dance, dance, dance
Jigsaw falling into place
There is nothing to explain
Regard each other as you pass
She looks back, you look back
Not just once
Not just twice
Wish away the nightmare
Wish away the nightmare
You've got a light you can feel it on your back
A light you can feel it on your back
Jigsaw falling into place
Just as you write my number down
Just as the drinks arrive
Just as they play your favourite song
As your bad mood disappears
No longer wound up like a spring
Before you've had too much
Come back in focus again
The walls abandon shape
They've got a Cheshire cat grin
All blurring into one
This place is on a mission
Before the night owl
Before the animal noises
Closed circuit cameras
Before you're comatose
Before you run away from me
Before you're lost between the notes
The beat goes round and round
The beat goes round and round
I never really got there
I just pretended that I had
What's the point of instruments
Words are a sawed off shotgun
Come on and let it out
Come on and let it out
Come on and let it out
Come on and let it out
Before you run away from me
Before you're lost between the notes
Just as you take the mic
Just as you dance, dance, dance
Jigsaw falling into place
There is nothing to explain
Regard each other as you pass
She looks back, you look back
Not just once
Not just twice
Wish away the nightmare
Wish away the nightmare
You've got a light you can feel it on your back
A light you can feel it on your back
Jigsaw falling into place
i mused over these exact same things last year. and came to much the same conclusions. as douglas coupland wrote, "fate is for losers." people give up responsibility for their life because they're not living it. there's nothing wrong with not understanding yourself, but then to give in to the gray doldrums of a bludgeoned existence is just sad and pathetic. not knowing what you want, or knowing and being ashamed of it is no excuse either.
RispondiElimina"Fate must be defied many times in order for a person to actually be called alive. This is because only a fool clings to Fate instead of living their own lives." — Tsunami Silver Dragon
I go back and forth on the concept of fate so much. In a sense, I definitely agree with everything that you said, and you know I'm right there with you on the whole loving astrology and all that for fun thing (though I can definitely take it too far sometimes, hah). But there's a part of me that does like believing sometimes certain things do happen for a purpose. I kind of like to think the random situations life throws at people are all very specific to the person, if that makes any sense. But then I get into that whole, "Wow, if I hadn't met this ONE certain person, I wouldn't have met her, then I wouldn't have gotten that job, then I wouldn't have met this person" and so on... leading me to feel totally ridiculous, haha. I don't know. This makes barely makes sense.
RispondiEliminaBut... JIGSAW FALLING INTO PLACE! :)